Winsome...and Then Some
Click below to download the Cornerstone Connections leader’s guide and student lesson. This week’s resources also include two lesson plans and a discussion starter video which offer different ways of looking at the topic. Each lesson plan includes opening activities, scripture passages, discussion questions, and real-life applications.
The story of God, the matchmaker, provides encouragement in this age of shaky relationships. Rebekah also portrays the virtue of going the second mile in service to others.
SCRIPTURE PASSAGES
OVERVIEW
What if you didn’t have any say in who the person was that you are going to marry? Wouldn’t that be odd? This practice has been around for centuries. The first story of an arranged marriage happens to be in Genesis 24, the passage of scripture for our lesson today. There are principles and details of this story that are fascinating that many people from our point in time struggle to understand. Grab your Bible and let’s dive in to see how God chose to work in this passage.
OPENING ACTIVITY: POINTS OF THE COMPASS
North—Draw a picture of your favorite hobby
East—Draw a picture of your favorite Bible story
South—Draw a picture of your dream vacation spot
West—Draw a picture of your most disliked automobile
DISCUSSION
TRANSITION
Life is full of choices, but we don’t always get to choose the way things go.
Fortunately, we have a choice about where we end up. Our lesson today is about choices, but it’s also about trust. Trust in God and trust in someone who’s been a significant part of Isaac’s life since he was a baby. Our story is also about love, commitment, and romance.
BIBLE STUDY GUIDE
Read Genesis 24:1-9.
1Abraham was now very old, and the Lord had blessed him in every way. 2 He said to the senior servant in his household, the one in charge of all that he had, “Put your hand under my thigh. 3 I want you to swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and the God of earth, that you will not get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I am living, 4 but will go to my country and my own relatives and get a wife for my son Isaac.”
5 The servant asked him, “What if the woman is unwilling to come back with me to this land? Shall I then take your son back to the country you came from?”
6 “Make sure that you do not take my son back there,” Abraham said. 7 “The Lord, the God of heaven, who brought me out of my father’s household and my native land and who spoke to me and promised me on oath, saying, ‘To your offspring I will give this land’—he will send his angel before you so that you can get a wife for my son from there. 8 If the woman is unwilling to come back with you, then you will be released from this oath of mine. Only do not take my son back there.” 9 So the servant put his hand under the thigh of his master Abraham and swore an oath to him concerning this matter.
DISCUSSION
Read Genesis 24:10-21.
10 Then the servant left, taking with him ten of his master’s camels loaded with all kinds of good things from his master. He set out for Aram Naharaim and made his way to the town of Nahor. 11 He had the camels kneel down near the well outside the town; it was toward evening, the time the women go out to draw water.
12 Then he prayed, “Lord, God of my master Abraham, make me successful today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. 13 See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. 14 May it be that when I say to a young woman, ‘Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I’ll water your camels too’—let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master.”
15 Before he had finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel son of Milkah, who was the wife of Abraham’s brother Nahor. 16 The woman was very beautiful, a virgin; no man had ever slept with her. She went down to the spring, filled her jar and came up again.
17 The servant hurried to meet her and said, “Please give me a little water from your jar.”
18 “Drink, my lord,” she said, and quickly lowered the jar to her hands and gave him a drink.
19 After she had given him a drink, she said, “I’ll draw water for your camels too, until they have had enough to drink.” 20 So she quickly emptied her jar into the trough, ran back to the well to draw more water, and drew enough for all his camels. 21 Without saying a word, the man watched her closely to learn whether or not the Lord had made his journey successful.
DISCUSSION
Read Genesis 24:42-49.
42 “When I came to the spring today, I said, ‘Lord, God of my master Abraham, if you will, please grant success to the journey on which I have come. 43 See, I am standing beside this spring. If a young woman comes out to draw water and I say to her, “Please let me drink a little water from your jar,” 44 and if she says to me, “Drink, and I’ll draw water for your camels too,” let her be the one the Lord has chosen for my master’s son.’
45 “Before I finished praying in my heart, Rebekah came out, with her jar on her shoulder. She went down to the spring and drew water, and I said to her, ‘Please give me a drink.’
46 “She quickly lowered her jar from her shoulder and said, ‘Drink, and I’ll water your camels too.’ So I drank, and she watered the camels also.
47 “I asked her, ‘Whose daughter are you?’
“She said, ‘The daughter of Bethuel son of Nahor, whom Milkah bore to him.’
“Then I put the ring in her nose and the bracelets on her arms, 48 and I bowed down and worshiped the Lord. I praised the Lord, the God of my master Abraham, who had led me on the right road to get the granddaughter of my master’s brother for his son. 49 Now if you will show kindness and faithfulness to my master, tell me; and if not, tell me, so I may know which way to turn.”
DISCUSSION
Read Genesis 24:50-51.
50 Laban and Bethuel answered, “This is from the Lord; we can say nothing to you one way or the other. 51 Here is Rebekah; take her and go, and let her become the wife of your master’s son, as the Lord has directed.”
Read Genesis 24:57-59.
57 Then they said, “Let’s call the young woman and ask her about it.” 58 So they called Rebekah and asked her, “Will you go with this man?”
“I will go,” she said.
59 So they sent their sister Rebekah on her way, along with her nurse and Abraham’s servant and his men.
DISCUSSION
Read Genesis 24:62-67.
62 Now Isaac had come from Beer Lahai Roi, for he was living in the Negev. 63 He went out to the field one evening to meditate, and as he looked up, he saw camels approaching. 64 Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac. She got down from her camel 65 and asked the servant, “Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?”
“He is my master,” the servant answered. So she took her veil and covered herself.
66 Then the servant told Isaac all he had done. 67 Isaac brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he married Rebekah. So she became his wife, and he loved her; and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.
This passage ends with a happily ever after vibe! However, stop for a moment to think about what it must have been like for both Isaac and Rebekah—awkward, uncomfortable, exciting, and a test of faith. According to the passage, they had a very short dating relationship before they got married and became intimate. Something to think about.
DISCUSSION
APPLICATION
God sometimes asks difficult things of us—His children. Can you think of times in your life when God asked you to do difficult things in yours? These moments can be opportunities to trust God’s sovereignty in your life and see what adventure He’s leading you on. Jeremiah 29:11, “For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope.” Life is an opportunity to follow God’s leadership in our lives.
FOLLOW UP
SCRIPTURE PASSAGE
LEADER’S NOTE
For a Relational Bible Study (RBS) you’ll want to get into the Scripture passage and encourage the youth to imagine participating in the story while it’s happening. Then you will be able to better apply it to your own situation today.
You will need to ask God for the Holy Spirit to be present as your small group discusses the questions (no more than 3-6 people in a group is recommended). Start with the opening question. It is a personal question and the answer is unique for each individual. There is no right answer and nobody is an expert here, so don’t be surprised when you hear different responses. You are depending on the Holy Spirit to be present and to speak through your group. Say what God prompts you to say, and listen to what others share.
Take turns reading the chapter out loud. Follow that with giving the students some time to individually mark their responses to the questions (a PDF version of the handout is available as a download). This gives each person a starting point for responding when you start to share as a group. Next, begin the discussion by asking the students to share what they marked and why on each question as you work your way through. Feel free to take more time on some questions than others as discussion warrants.
Encourage each person in the group to apply what is discussed to their personal lives and to share with the group what they believe God wants them to do. Then ask them to pray that God will help each of them to follow through in doing so. Remind them to expect that God will show them ways to live out the message of this passage in the coming week, and that they are free to ask others in the group to help hold them accountable.
OVERVIEW
In Genesis 24, Abraham asks his senior servant to swear an oath to find his son Isaac a wife from his homeland instead of in Canaan. Though this journey had a direct route that was 500 miles long, the most common route was 900 miles long, so it would be quite a trek for his servant to make this trip, and Abraham in his old age wasn’t sure if he would see this hoped for prayer be answered.
A major theme in this chapter is waiting on the Lord, as Abraham waited to see how God would answer his prayer, Abraham’s servant prayed for and waited for the sign of Isaac’s wife when he got to the homeland, Isaac waited for God to bring a wife from far away, and Rebekah waited the long journey to meet who God chose for her to be with.
This relational Bible study covers this account of the answered prayers that led to God’s providential timing for Isaac and Rebekah’s marriage and the faith the characters showed by waiting on God for this major decision and invites participants to consider submitting their decisions to God in active prayer and surrender as they may consider the things in their future.
Wait on the Lord
Share a story about the longest line you’ve waited in.
Read Genesis 24:1-21.
Abraham was now very old, and the Lord had blessed him in every way. 2 He said to the senior servant in his household, the one in charge of all that he had, “Put your hand under my thigh. 3 I want you to swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and the God of earth, that you will not get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I am living, 4 but will go to my country and my own relatives and get a wife for my son Isaac.”
5 The servant asked him, “What if the woman is unwilling to come back with me to this land? Shall I then take your son back to the country you came from?”
6 “Make sure that you do not take my son back there,” Abraham said. 7 “The Lord, the God of heaven, who brought me out of my father’s household and my native land and who spoke to me and promised me on oath, saying, ‘To your offspring I will give this land’—he will send his angel before you so that you can get a wife for my son from there. 8 If the woman is unwilling to come back with you, then you will be released from this oath of mine. Only do not take my son back there.” 9 So the servant put his hand under the thigh of his master Abraham and swore an oath to him concerning this matter.
10 Then the servant left, taking with him ten of his master’s camels loaded with all kinds of good things from his master. He set out for Aram Naharaim and made his way to the town of Nahor. 11 He had the camels kneel down near the well outside the town; it was toward evening, the time the women go out to draw water.
12 Then he prayed, “Lord, God of my master Abraham, make me successful today, and show kindness to my master Abraham. 13 See, I am standing beside this spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. 14 May it be that when I say to a young woman, ‘Please let down your jar that I may have a drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I’ll water your camels too’—let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master.”
15 Before he had finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel son of Milkah, who was the wife of Abraham’s brother Nahor. 16 The woman was very beautiful, a virgin; no man had ever slept with her. She went down to the spring, filled her jar and came up again.
17 The servant hurried to meet her and said, “Please give me a little water from your jar.”
18 “Drink, my lord,” she said, and quickly lowered the jar to her hands and gave him a drink.
19 After she had given him a drink, she said, “I’ll draw water for your camels too, until they have had enough to drink.” 20 So she quickly emptied her jar into the trough, ran back to the well to draw more water, and drew enough for all his camels. 21 Without saying a word, the man watched her closely to learn whether or not the Lord had made his journey successful.
Read Genesis 24:58-67.
58 So they called Rebekah and asked her, “Will you go with this man?”
“I will go,” she said.
59 So they sent their sister Rebekah on her way, along with her nurse and Abraham’s servant and his men. 60 And they blessed Rebekah and said to her, “Our sister, may you increase to thousands upon thousands; may your offspring possess the cities of their enemies.”
61 Then Rebekah and her attendants got ready and mounted the camels and went back with the man. So the servant took Rebekah and left.
62 Now Isaac had come from Beer Lahai Roi, for he was living in the Negev. 63 He went out to the field one evening to meditate, t and as he looked up, he saw camels approaching. 64 Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac. She got down from her camel 65 and asked the servant, “Who is that man in the field coming to meet us?”
“He is my master,” the servant answered. So she took her veil and covered herself.
66 Then the servant told Isaac all he had done. 67 Isaac brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he married Rebekah. So she became his wife, and he loved her; and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.
1. What did Abraham want his servant to do?
2. What did the servant ask God for?
3. What happens after Rebekah is asked, “Will you go?”
4. Which character from this chapter matches with each faith statement? (Fill in the blank. Options: Isaac, Rebekah, Abraham, the servant):
5. What are things you’re waiting for?
6. How did the characters in the story wait on God?
7. What decisions in your life do you want to give to God in prayer?
8. What would waiting in faith look like for you?
SUMMARY
Waiting on the Lord is not easy, but Isaiah 40:31 reminds us “they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” Waiting on the Lord and His timing is one of the wisest choices we can make.
In Genesis 24, there are examples of long waiting like Abraham and Isaac waiting for Abraham’s servant Eliezer to return and Rebekah waiting to make it to Canaan, but there is also seen short waiting times as in Eliezer’s prayer being answered before he’s finished praying. Regardless of the length of time, seeking God’s counsel and waiting for Him while actively seeking helps us to make better choices, both big and small.
At the end of the story, though God gave a sign that Rebekah would be a great choice to be Isaac’s wife, it was up to Rebekah to decide if she would go or not, and God gives us the same free will to make choices whether we want to follow His leading or not. Because of Rebekah’s choice, she ended up not only moving to Canaan, but becoming one of the women in Jesus’ earthly family tree! How cool is that?
APPLICATION
Isaiah 65:24 states ‘Before they call I will answer, while they are yet speaking I will hear.’ In this story, before Abraham’s servant Eliezer even finishes his prayer, God sends Rebekah his way. While we’re waiting on God, it’s encouraging to remember all the ways He’s answered us before.
Abraham’s servant does something that seems quite strange in our times. He places his hand under Abraham’s thigh, but this was a solemn ceremony reserved for an oath that one would swear to another in their culture. By doing this, he showed that this was a sacred oath he would take to fulfill a mission for Abraham, only to be released if the wife did not want to move to Canaan. In Genesis 24, this servant keeps his promise. God is also faithful to keep His promises to us.